OKC: About me Pt.1

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Part 2 here

I recently graduated two years ago Magna Cum Laude so I could slowly afford pay small fractions of $60,000.00 back with the added bonus of a card that doctors take up front and you pay more later. My boss is a professional delegator who talks better in circles than most politicians. Actually earlier today we had a 45 minute informative discussion about how our company’s workflow charts operate that ended abruptly with the shouted question “Why wasn’t this taught in school?” I’ll ask next time I’m there.

Luckily for me I’m not always in the office and get to travel quite a bit. My last two destinations varied greatly from a small town in the middle of Oklahoma to Los Angeles, where I partook in my first legitimate Rodeo and found myself walking through a Neiman Marcus on Rodeo drive, all in one month. Ironically enough, at both places the locals took my friendliness and met it with modern day hostility. “Excuse me do you know where-” “No I don’t! Fuck off!” (insert your accent of choice).

When I’m not shuffling around the U.S. or playing Candy Crush in the bathroom at work, I like to workout, have a drink with friends, pretend I know how to Salsa dance, and write down different stories so I have enough material for a book. I live in Uptown, which automatically makes me a date raping douche bag within the Dallas OkCupid Community, even though I drive a beat up Honda Civic, and get called a “fairy” by most of the local guys because I don’t give a fuck about Dak Prescot, that’s the price you pay for a cheap apartment next to a bar.

One day I plan on getting fed up enough at my job that I move back to the north, possibly to Boston, but I’m waiting until I’ve perfected my “Facken acksent”.

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